April Already?

It's April already? Where'd March go? Or even the end of February for that matter? And why is there a thin little blond walking around naked in my house? (No, this is not some perverted porn palace--back before defilement entered the world, people, two to be precise, walked around naked and were "unashamed.") I can no longer walk around, giggling, while naked, in broad daylight. I think that is a privilege given only to innocent pre-schoolers who like to warm themselves by the fire before lamenting themselves into actually putting clothes on (was my skin really that smooth once???).

Anyway, I can't believe April is almost half over.

Time can go so quickly, and yet so slowly at times. Fast when it's fun, painfully slow when its not, or it can go-gone: it's just gone, in a flash, when you mentally take a leave of absence and then wake up one day and say, "It's April already? Where'd March go? Or even the end of February for that matter?" Go-gone. I believe that's the official term for that certain span of time that you simply cannot account for other than you're sure you slept, perhaps ate, and bathed a few times...but you can't be sure. Is that ME I smell?

Why no. It's the new recipe I've put in the crock pot to torture me all day as I smell the sweet chili sauce tangoing with a splash of chipolte, fresh squeezed lemon, crushed garlic, chili powder and molasses. Of course, I couldn't follow the recipe exactly, that would be proposterous; so we'll see just how well these chicken tenders turn out.

So, it's April already and I struggle within my brain. I wrestle inside my head and am amazed at how one proportionally small unit of the body can be such a force to be reckoned with. I have never been pitted against myself so much as these past few months. Or has it been years? Grey mass can be so hard to reign in, bring under one's rule, to be made obedient. Many things I have been learning, my young Pad-wa, that I may one day be a great Jedi Master.

And I don't even like Star Wars.

Go ahead, stone me! Call me un-American! I DON'T LIKE STAR WARS!!! Why couldn't they just be in chronological order, anyway? Why's it got to be so confusing? Lord of the Rings, now that I can handle, even like. Beautiful scenery, quick dialog, epic battles..."And I am no man..." she passionately states, as she yanks off her battle helmet, blond locks tumbling down around her vexed face, and *poof* the demon fighter is defeated! Now, that's a scene that rivals Yoda. Come on: long haired blond babe in mid-evil dress or scary looking green globular man-it-thing in potato sack? How hard is this, really?

So, anyway, March flew by like one of those Death Riders from above movie, screeching its blood-curdling, life sucking, fear striking, screech, and now it's April. Already. Already it's April. And I find myself in a very curious place. My life now has a new perspective: the Before and After; like a canyon that divides two towns. All of life's events are neatly shuffled into one of two places, fitted snuggly into a large, nonexistent file cabinet under one of two headings: Before or After. And what a nice place, if it can be called that, for a division line; age 30.

You know that song, "Life is a highway, I'm gonna ride it all night long?" Was that written in a euphoric state? Who's life is a highway? Highways are smooth roads being, usually, the shortest distance between two other points, often creating a line. Highways have painted lines, signs giving clear directions, rest stops and soft shoulders. They're pleasant to ride, especially in a convertible, the wind racing through your hair and caressing your skin. Whilst it's a fun song to sing as a teenager, life ain't no highway.

No, baby, it ain't no highway.

How'd it get to be April already?